THE CASTING COUCH

Acrobat  painted by Pablo Picasso

Hello darling. You look marvelous. So handsome. So manly. Sit! Sit! I must tell you all about my latest toy. Devastating! Really! Devine! Clever Ida, you must remember her, the pushy blonde from Vancouver with the little cleft in her, ah! She claimed the boy was spineless, lithe like I love them, so I took him on for a spin.

At first he was reluctant to go with my plan but after Ida did a nice bit of arm twisting he loosened up and put his whole self into my every suggestion, fell head over heels with such innovation that even the take-out girls were rubber-necking to get a view.

This boy wound himself around my little finger for hours. Every curve I threw he matched.  Stood on his head and bent over backwards to satisfy my slightest desire. Went to any length, turned himself inside out to please me and I am, ah . . . a bit convoluted as you know if I’m pressed.

One thing led to another until he got in a twist though I was only pulling his leg. Then he put his foot in his mouth until he was bent clear out of shape. When I tried to relax him he went right over the edge, wrapped himself around a telephone pole and then turned, no stopped, on a dime.

I signed him at once. We start shooting tomorrow. The writers have twelve hours to get me a script. Spies. Betrayal. The usual stuff. The boy will do the stunts and you, my beauty, must star.

 

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Acrobat” painted by Pablo Picasso in 1930
Musee Picasso, Paris, France
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